An Open Book

Today you are getting a look inside my prayer journal.... An Open Book

I find myself just so full of questions and wonder. God has been showing me a side of him that I've never seen like this. He has been showing me grace and love and giving. This isn't a new character of God, this isn't even a character that I was unaware of. It is simply a new depth.

It seems as though I cannot get enough of God. I cannot understand enough of his grace and his love. The legalistic side of things I can understand. My brain can comprehend do this and don't do that. I would never ever be able to live according to the law in such strictness and harshness. No one could that is why Jesus came, but I could understand it. What my brain cannot process fully is grace or love. Not grace and love as we know it, not how we use and feel toward others, but GOD'S GRACE, GOD'S LOVE.

I am at a point in my faith and my relationship with God, my faith, that I know and am at peace with the fact that I will never ever fully understand these things. That is what faith is, the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen. (Hebrews 11:1 NKJ) Side note: substance is defined as the real physical matter of which a person or thing consists and which has a tangible, solid presence. Evidence is defined as the available body of facts or information indicating whether a belief or proposition is true or valid. Just so everyone can understand this, you have something that you only hoped for and there are facts for things that you cannot see! This is faith. This is why it is so hard to answer the questions about faith that are "well if this happened then what about that?" or "If they do this then they should get that in return..." Faith doesn't work like that. It is like the wind, you can feel it and see the effects of it (swaying trees, tumbling leaves, ripples on the water) but you cannot see the wind itself.

So my heart cries out because I want to be better at living in that balance of the higher calling of living Holy and the grace of knowing I will never be able to fully live a Holy life. My heart also cries for those who are far away, who don't know God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. For those who do not have a relationship with God, who simply try to live under the law and follow all of the rules but inside their heart is cold and calloused. My heart aches for those who use God's grace as an excuse to do whatever they want whenever they want simply saying "I don't feel convicted of this or about that." or well all I have to do is ask God to forgive me."

God I just pray right now that your spirit will be accepted by people all around the world. People right here in my hometown in southeastern Oklahoma, by the family members I have. I pray this over every portion and spec of your earth. You have already poured out your spirit, and made the Holy Spirit available to us. I simply pray an acceptance of your gift! I pray that your passion and love will consume people and we will see an awakening of your children. Your children rising up to follow after the dreams and visions you have placed in them and called them to! I pray for your anointing! God use us! Use me!

~Awaken Us~
Brenna Stanford